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THINGS THAT AGGRAVATE ME (LOTS)

I am shrill/loud/annoying. I KNOW THAT. Why people have the need to constantly remind me is honestly beyond all reasoning.
Good looking wankstain boys who know that they’re hot!! Use their friggin hotness to manipulate everyone and then complain that no one takes them seriously. NO SHIT! YOU WOULD FLIRT WITH DOT BRANNING FROM EASTENDERS IF SHE WAS INFRONT OF YOU. Please do us all a favour and throw yourselves in front of a bus.
STUPID STUPID GIRLS. You know the ones, the whiney little miss no boobs ones that upload pictures of themselves wearing an eye mask for a bra and have a caption ’I hate my body’ a)you should fucking hate it, you look like an 8 year old boy. b) why the fuck do you upload it onto a website where 23528967169 people can see it?!?!?! THEN they have the downright CHEEK to complain that people call them a whore. Just... get out of my life.
Teachers that try and ’keep with the times’ by saying the words ’bare’, ’bang bang’ and ’skeen’ in the failed attempt to try and persuade a bunch of hormonal teenagers that quite frankly DON’T GIVE A RATS ARSE that they are cool. Please, go to your cupboard, take out your shotgun, load it, turn it on yourself and pull the fucking trigger.
Those absolute tosser chav wankers who go around thinking that it’s cool to beat the living daylight out of others. Some chavs I can actually deal with because I enjoy mocking them as they are too THICK AS SHIT to even realise. But those ones, please, someone starve them of oxygen.
Controlling parents who don’t let their kids have a childhood. What is the fucking point? Seriously. Just wait, as soon as your beloved son/daughter strolls into Uni, they shall be high on every drug ever made. EVER.
TWATS THAT CALL WHITE PEOPLE RACIST. a) if we were racist, why WHYYYYYY the absolute FUCK would we live in Harrow. THERE’S ABOUT 3 WHITE PEOPLE IN MY WHOLE STREET. INCLUDING ME..... AND MY MUM. b) Saying ’mate do you have a black pen’ does not make us racist. Just shut up!!!! If I was a black one armed lesbian I’d have no problems in life.
My umbrella.Why oh WHYYY must it turn itself inside out at the exact moment that a zac effron/  channing tatum/ chad m-m look alike walks past?! I think it has a brain and thinks ’WELL DON’T PRETEND I’M GOING INSIDE OUT WHEN YOU’RE WAITING AT THE BUS STOP AND TRYING TO SCARE THE CARS THEN’. 
Insects. Just no. I cannot deal with them. Especially spiders. ahfuioaygoh. I am actually getting the shivers now. I HATE THEM. My motto is ’more than four legs you die’. I don’t even care if I am killing another living creature. They don’t fucking do anything helpful in the world. I’m cruel deal with it. ALTHOUGH. Having said that, Barry from Bee Movie in his Pollen Jock outfit could fly through my window anyday of the week. That movie is genius.  
People that are so far up one another’s arses. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW DAYLIGHT MATE?! 
People who have no personality and just sit there like an idle retard. Get out of my life you potato. I HATE IDIOTS.
PC FOR FUCKING PC. WHO EVER INVENTED I SWEARRRR PLEASE, FIND A FIELD, DIG A HOLE, THROW YOURSELF IN IT. and stay there you bastard

Those arseholes that work in McDonalds. It’s no wonder they’ve ended up in such a dead end job. Half of them don’t speak English and the rest are just paedophiles who need to shave their moustaches.
This is a bit of a lie, but I hate perverts that honk their horns at twelve year olds in the street. Please get castrated. I mean sure, I love it when it happens to me ’cause let’s be frank, I need a pick me up after spending 6 hours at the shithole that is my sixth form, but 12 year olds who are still wearing ’my first bras’ from marks and spencers and are wearing t-shirts saying ’Bad Girl’? What are you thinking pervy men in white vans!?
The word babe. If you want me to puke in your shoes and force you to walk around in it all day, please, be my guest. Feel free to call me that Chavvy, cheapo pub word.
Those absolute cunts at gigs whom I can only guess have never heard of the word D-E-O-D-O-U-R-A-N-T. You know the ones, they push infront of you, jump on your toes and wipe their smelly, sweaty backs all over your face. DIE BITCH DIE.
Tap water. Am I the only person in this world that feels the need to wash my mouth out with disinfectant after drinking some? 
The whole concept of Father Christmas. What an idiotic, Americanised, stupid stupid FOOL. Who decided that some fat bastard should take the credit for the presents kids get from their parents? He aint getting any credit from my kids. Infact, I might just force my kids to run around the playground and tell everyone he’s not real. What retarded kid believed it anyway. Sure you may be 5, but you still have concept of size. I knew he couldn’t fit down the bloody chimney, I just pretended to my parents I thought he was real so I could still get presents. PLUS the whole idea was stolen from Germany and Austria anyway! In Austria, we have St Nichalous who comes on the 6th Dec and fills our shoes with chocolate and presents and on Christmas, the angels help our parents with our presents. Now that’s just a nicer concept all round.
The old woman on my H12 bus route to South Harrow after sixth form that looks insanely like Winston Churchill. One day, I am going to hit her so hard. She’s the kind of cunt that tuts when someone breathes a little too fucking loud for her liking. I HATE HER AHFSIOHASKFASI.
THOSE INSANELY BAD BUS DRIVERS THAT I SWEAR ARE STILL LEARNING TO FUCKING DRIVE. The amount of folders/shoes/pencils I have been through after being thrown around bloody buses after school is insane.
Couples that claim to be in love with each other after going out for a day. Please. Take your fucking heart emoticons out of your screen names, tie a brick to your big toe and jump off a bridge.
People who don’t watch FRIENDS. It is a work of comical genius. If you don’t like friends, I don’t like you. GET OUT.
On the subject of things you haven’t watched... If you have not watched Grease/The Sound of Music/The Lion King PLEAAAAAASE. Just eject yourself from my life.
Dogs. They smell, their tongues flail around spraying phlegm on me, what’s with the tail wagging and WHY ARE THEY SO HAPPY ALL THE TIME ANYWAY!?!?!?!!?!?!?!
When a fat person says ’I’m sooo fat’ and everyone goes ’:O No you’re not, what are you talking about. You’re so skinny’. WHY LIE? DON’T GIVE THE POOR BASTARD HOPE.
The sign ’<3’... OH YOU LESS THAN THREE ME DO YOU?! JUST DIE!
WANKERS that claim to be Indie. Why don’t you take a look through your sodding wardrobe and see where your clothes are from. Topshop. Topshop. More fucking Topshop maybe? Please, if you want to be Indie can you take your fat arse down to Oxfam and ACTUALLY be Indie.
EILEEN. MY DAD’S GIRLFRIEND. THE WOMAN ONCE CAME INTO MY ROOM WITH ONLY ONE SOCK ON. AND THE SOCK THAT SHE ACTUALLY WAS WEARING WAS HALF ON AND HALF OFF. I swear. That was actually the moment I began to hate her. I mean sure, you’ve just got out of bed, BUT THERE’S A FULL LENGTH FUCKING MIRROR OUTSIDE YOUR BEDROOM DOOR SO WHY NOT TAKE A LOOK IN IT ONCE IN A WHILE RATHER THAN MAKING ME SHUDDER AT THE SIGHT OF YOU.
Fat people that have their belly buttons pierced. WHY GOD? WHY? When I’ve just eaten breakfast I would really rather not throw it back up all over my lap whilst driving through Harrow. I literally have to cover my eyes when I see the back of them. It’s possibly the ugliest thing ever. everrrrr. Why can’t someone just shake them and say ’YOU’RE FAT , YOU HAVE BODY ODOUR, NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOUR CELULITE INFESTED PASTEY WHITE STOMACH THAT LOOKS AS THOUGH SOMEONE HAS OPENED YOUR TRAP AND SHOVED A FOOTBALL INTO.’ They should be shot to save us all. My fucking 73 year old nan would look better in a belly top.
Daddy long legs. Who invented them!? WHO!? They’re good for nothing pieces of string that float around scaring the heck out of me. AND they live for a sodding day!! A DAY! GREAT LIFE. I SAY WE MAKE A PETITION TO HAVE THEM MADE EXTINCT.